Just wanted to check in and give everyone an update..
I'm still dealing with stuff with my dad. I just got back from Florida this past week. I spent alot of quality time with him. It was heartbreaking to know that it's probably the last time i'll see him alive. How do you say goodbye to a man that you thought of as not only a father but a best friend? I have some of the most incredible memories of times we have spent together. I sat with him and talked about all of them. He is so weak that all he could do was stare off into space but, I have to believe he heard me and felt every ounce of love I was passing his way. There was a few times that he responded to me. (i called them moments of lucidity) He cried alot, as did I. The only thing he was really able to express to me was that he was scared and knew he was dying and, how much he loved all of his kids. We also had a moment where we had a good laugh. He is using a bottle thingy to pee and needed help holding it. (the pee bottle, not the weenie) He begged me not to look. I had to tell him to get over his bashfulness or he'd be covered in pee. LOL I am so going to miss him when he is gone!
I hope all of you are well... You have all been in my thoughts. Stop by and say hi!!
XOXO's
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you sound very strong in this situation.my dad passed away very suddenly,and i think the way you are losing your dad,is even worse,because you know it's coming.
ReplyDeletei'll think of you,and your family.may you get through this.
xoxo
i am so sorry. this is heartbreaking and so unfair. i wish i could help or do or say something to make it better. he sounds like a great dad, so i know that is something to be grateful for, and that you can cherish for the rest of your life.
ReplyDeleteGosh that's heartbreaking. I'm tearing up just reading about this. I can only imagine how hard it must be. I hope you and he are getting lots of hugs and support right now. Even though we really don't even know each other, please know that I'm sending genuine loving thoughts from Australia. It's terribly unfair that anybody has to go through this. It's lovely that you got to spend some quality time with your Dad. Your presence alone definitely would have eased his pain tremendously. Love and peace to both of you, and the rest of your family. <3
ReplyDeletexox